Wise thoughts, well stated: Anne Lamott's "It’s good to remember: We are all on borrowed time" (in the Washington Post, 30 Oct 2023). Some short samples:
So many indignities are involved in aging, and yet so many graces, too. The perfectionism that had run me ragged and has kept me scared and wired my whole life has abated. The idea of perfectionism at 60 is comical when, like me, you’ve worn non-matching black flats out on stage. In my experience, most of us age away from brain and ambition toward heart and soul, and we bathe in relief that things are not worse. When I was younger, I was fixated on looking good and impressing people and being so big in the world. By 60, I didn’t care nearly as much what people thought of me, mostly. And anyway, you know by 60 that people are rarely thinking of you. They are thinking about their own finances, family problems and upper arms.
... My dad said after his cancer diagnosis that we are all on borrowed time, and it is good to be reminded of this now and again. It’s a great line, and the third-most-popular conversation we oldies have with each other, after the decline of our bodies and the latest senior moments: how many memorial services we go to these days. Some weeks, it feels as though there is a sniper in the trees, picking off people we have loved for years. It breaks your heart, but as Carly Simon sang, there is more room in a broken heart. My heart is the roomiest it has ever been. I do live in my heart more, which is hard in its own ways, but the blessing is that the yammer in my head is quieter, the endless questioning: What am I supposed to be doing? Is this the right thing? What do you think of that? What does he think of that? My parents and the culture told me that I would be happier if I did a certain thing, or stopped doing that, or tried harder and did better. But as my great friend Father Terry Richey said, it’s not about trying harder; it’s about resisting less. This is right up aging’s alley. Some days are sweet, some are just too long.
and
... yes, a bit too first-person, a bit too comic-punchline-setup-delivery, a bit too small — yet also, totally good. Thank you, Ms Lamott, for the gentle reminders.
(cf Headlights and Decisions (1999-06-27), Help, Thanks, Wow (2013-02-25), ...) - ^z - 2023-11-09